Compulsive Auditing. UMI series #2

'Compulsive Auditing' is an illness usually associated with professional organisations/ corporate bodies. It may be linked with 'Money Worship' or forms of psychosis in which human life and pleasure are seen as worthless whilst profit and anally-retentive achievement standards are elevated to realms perceived as sacred.

Signs and symptoms.
CA may first appear in the form of prolific memos, e-mails and or cyber-conferencing. Real live face-to-face meetings are less common and, if they do occur, will be devoid of humour or common sense.
Communication will lack nuance, empathy or pleasure and become somewhat robotic. Measuring, comparing and itemising will replace any qualitative value judgements and tick boxes will proliferate.
As the illness develops, sufferers will become convinced that measuring things really does make them grow and will develop a paranoid outlook in which competitors constantly lurk waiting to eclipse their performance targets and thus remove their right to live.

Cure.
Unfortunately, rather than seek help, most sufferers will cluster together in 'focus groups' in which their symptoms worsen. They will become gripped by the need to invent more and more delusions believing that false and fractured goals actually improve their functionality. Indeed, many sufferers will rise in status occupying positions of power within their organisations which then, of course, become rife with the collective strain of the disease.
It is hard to intervene once the illness has taken over and is usually best to withdraw from the group and wait until it burns itself out thru in-fighting, splinter groups, breakdown, financial collapse or, occasionally, suicide.


N.B. Tho known as Compulsive Auditing. CA appears in various forms beyond actual auditing. i.e. 'Performance Evaluation', 'Target Setting', 'Efficiency Improvement Measures' and other seemingly helpful strategies can become carriers of the pseudo-improvement virus and thus lead to all the destructive symptoms of CA.

In it's advanced forms and, often, in cases of creative individuals, CA may lead to delusional psychosis. e.g. 'Blue Sky Thinking', 'Unlimited Personal Gain' and, even 'The Big Society'.

UMI ( unidentified mental illness) series

Hello, in case yr wondering what the %&(%^! this is all about!!!,
My random musings are currently applying themselves to the concept of mental health and illness and how these concepts are catagorised and defined in mainstreram society. It interests me to explore states and concepts which I beleive are detrimental to the richness of human life and yet considered sane and acceptable, "normal" even! i.e. corporate greed, ruthless ambition, lack of compassion. No one has ever been diagnosed mentally ill for displaying these qualities yet they do untold harm to global life on earth.
Eroticised Warmongering. Non-consensual Use of Authority, Compulsive Auditing. See what i mean?
I'm interested to create names for these behaviors and explore, in a creative provocative way, their impact on our lives and sense of mental health and illness.
I'm also enjoying bringing a playful spirit of enquiry to an area only just emerging from stigma, shame and hidden pain.

Delusional Division

Delusional Division is a mental health problem.
I'm here to tell you!
It's not a recognised diagnosis, as far as I'm aware, yet, but I believe it should be.
Delusional division is a state of mind in which a person believes that there are two types of person:
1. People who experience mental health problems/ mental distress.
2. People who never experience mental health problems/mental distress.
Some people are so entrenched in this delusion that they believe it to be true.
Others know the division to be false but may fall into divisive thinking at times of stress.


Causes.
DD is believed to be multi-causal.
It can arise from a fear of the vast range of states and experiences human beings are able to experience; from stigmatisation of some of these states and from a wish to dissociate from individuals experiencing them.
DD thrives in environments which cling to a limited view of "normality" and which seek to alienate that which they fear.
Where curiosity and respectful enquiry is replaced by fear; where there are social penalties for deviation and where there is a lack of faith in the capacity of human beings to experience distress, even extreme distress, and survive; there DD will thrive.
DD is just one of a range of "them" & "us" type syndromes which can arise from a misguided wish to elevate one's own status by disowning kinship with others.


Effects.
DD is a fear-based mental illness that arises from misinformation.
When suffering with DD a person will experience restricted freedom of expression, a fear of others' experience and/or limited empathy with others. In its worst forms DD can lead to discrimination, oppression and an inability to respond helpfully to others' needs.

Cure.
Full cure requires a complete overhaul of social attitudes creating an environment in which this delusion cannot thrive.
Individuals can increase their immunity by rejecting divisional thinking, owning the full-spectrum of their own experience and increasing empathy, acceptance and respectful interest in the experiences of others.

Song

This is a new song... so u cant hear the tune!!! but thought I'd post anyway.

I wrote a song about saving the world
then I was too afraid to sing it
cause here in this free western democracy
seems there's less & less real freedom in it

we're under surveillence from cameras & men
supposedly meant to protect us
“oh officer please don't push me I have a weak heart”
of course the 2 things are competely disconnected.

& if you should find yrself ill, weak or poor
& need state help just with surviving
well best not complain too loud long or sure
or that help may never be arriving

we're free to get drunk, work in jobs we dont love
& buy lots of clothes made in China
we're free to hate our bodies and try to change our face
our breasts and our other areas which are actually stunningly beautifully exactly as they are!

& we spend so much time filmed on CCTV
if there were oscars surely we'd all o won 'it
'Best crossing the road', 'Best female picking yr nose'
“without my family & friends I could ne'er o done it!”

& some of us remember somewhere under the skin
when freedom felt like fire in the blood
& not only did we stand, shout & call for human rights
we believed we could build a world we love

So go find a camera & tell it yr dreams
there not there just to watch us walk & vomit!
Think about yr fears and yr hopes for the world,
Then say it & make sure a cameras on it!

errrmm invisible photos!!!!

Ok Its official I cannot work out how to post photos on this thing!!!!!!!

challenges

Well here I am struggling with a low-level yeuch-feeling virus and emotional pain resulting from a visit to my family. My dad has had some problem with swallowing and digestion and sees a specialist in 2 weeks time. He's 82, normally amazingly healthy and my brothers sole carer. Considering his needs and responding supportively feels fine & easy when I'm strong & well, but when I'm not it opens a right can o worms Re; the inequalities of care in our family, my virtial invisibility and my brothers infantile status beyond his actual needs. It's hard being silenced by yr family and ignored when yr in pain. Its also challenging facing up to my dad's mortality and the relatively little time we've had to see and appreciate each other beyond the shadow of tragedy my brother's illness and stigma of shame cast over our family. On top o this, they read the Daily Express! which interjects unexpected shots of homophobia , xenophobia and blatent sexism into this man who, actually, holds very loving and respectful values towards his fellow beings. If I'm not robust it floors me. and has pretty much done so this time. along with whatever viral shite I've picked up, probably from my brother.
So, here I am feeling angry and hurt and vulnerable, supposedly bloggin on sustainable love and the delights of earthly life!!!!!!
I',m moved by others support and emotional bravery. Just read an amazing post by transwoman Annie Danger on Fb re; support- or lack of it- from her dyke/womyn friends.
I guess really sustainable love is embracing all the challenges life throws at us and moving thru with courage, power and real love. I almost feel up to the challenge.
xxxC

Hiccups on the road to success!

well,
I was all prepared to go & sing at a folk night last night... then had a wobble & bottled out! It's really unusual for me & no big deal really, I wasn't booked or anything... but has wobbled me a bit as getting more out there with my music is a recent goal I have some high hopes for..... Its not like me to resist a mic opportunity... tho actually there was no mic for this one... it was an unplugged singers night. maybe that was it!!!! hee hee!

..... seriously tho, need to look a building some support for myself to make the goal more attainable.

Pride 2010

Pride 2010

Lucky!

Today I rejoice in the freedoms of the western world!
Just been to dental hospital to have my wounds checked.. & all is healing nicely. Thank you surviving NHS dentistry!
Strolled around sunny sheffield, bought lovely lingerie & did some research for my next bout of queer feminist comedy. Pretty lucky life hey?

Pride 2010

Sustainable love and eco-friendly delights.....

Helloo virtual world!

This is my first foray into blog world.

I'm currently interested in enhanced mental Health.. Love beyond conventional coupledom and sustainablity re; human life on earth.

Betwixt these large & lofty thoughts I'm working on my acoustic song reportiore and seeking a recording set up.

I've just aquired the domain for www.sustainablentertainment.org which, when I build it will be a site supporting eco-friendly, low/no carbon entertainment initiatives.

errm so i guess thats it for now!